A Taste of God Realization
In the early morning of Monday, 26 August, I began to
meditate, while sitting on the floor with my eyes closed, and I had an incredibly
powerful experience.
Early on, I noticed that I could see with my inner eyes farther
than usual. There was a tinge of redness in the background, if you will, which resembled
tiny jewels.
At some point, the veins on either side of my head, the
right side in particular, began to twitch, which often happens after exercise. Then
my temples as well as my third-eye point began to throb. Through my third eye I
was connected to higher worlds by a faint, white-colored thread, which I could at
times see and feel. My third eye began to pound as if it was being pounded on
or struck, which, several times, caused me to bury my head in my hands.
When I sat up, I, that is, Robert, was gone. All was
present. Infinite All observed Infinite All. There was a sensation of expansion
inside of the skull, between the ears, without direct awareness of the skull,
which resulted in the experience of limitlessness. And there was also the sensation,
difficult to describe, of invisible blankets or layers being simultaneously
taken off and put on. The predominant feeling was one of ecstasy, and at its
edges were love and gratitude.
Then there was fear that I / Robert could not live in the
world in this state and then there was the sound of a police siren from the
street below and then the thought of our neighbor storing tomato sauce in the freezer
and then I / Robert was back and the All was gone, eclipsed, at least for the
time being.
The experience lasted approximately ten minutes. Based on
what I have read, I believe that I experienced samadhi. I have read and re-read
descriptions of savikalpa samadhi, nirvikalpa samadhi, and sahaja samadhi, and the
description of nirvikalpa samadhi reflects my experience.
Again, this was an incredible powerful experience, which both
confirmed and taught. What was confirmed? The journey continues. Living in the
world, being of service, and returning home, to the Ocean of Light, are inseparable.
What was taught? There is a series or string of God Realizations destined to
occur. To facilitate these Realizations, I must surrender my lower selves to
the Purest Light (who comes to me as Master and Mistress but more often as Master);
I must surrender their desires, hurts, and mistakes, which still bind me to the
finite, thereby obscuring the Infinite, so these selves can experience God
Realization.
My Prayer of Surrender,
which I pray constantly:
I
surrender to You, Master.
I
give myself to You, Master.
I am
Yours, Master, save me.
I unconditionally
surrender my will to Your will, Master.
I
surrender my lower selves to You, Master.
I
surrender the hurt and pain of my lower selves to You, Master.
I
surrender my darkness to You, Master.
I
surrender Robert to You, Master.
I
surrender all there is to You, Master.
One
Self, One Self, One Self, One Infinite Self.